Lauren Krueger & Matthew David Brozik

Best friends.

In Definally on August 1, 2011 at 10:00 am

Liz B. of Carle Place, NY didn’t ask a question, but she did refer to her three best friends in earshot of Definally., so now Definally. will address the propriety/protocol of having more than one best friend.

In the first place, there’s nothing wrong with having more than one best friend. “Best” does not necessarily refer to one person or thing only. There are such things as ties in competition (or mere comparison), so Liz can by all means have three best friends.

That said, the number of best friends one may have absolutely depends on the total number of friends one has. And Definally. asserts that one may have one additional best friend for every hundred total friends. But they have to be real friends—not Facebook friends, not friends of friends, not imaginary Canadian girl- or boy- friends.

Therefore: If you have between 100 and 199 actual friends, then you may have two best friends. If you have 200-299, you may have three best friends. And so on. Otherwise, you have to be less lenient in your labeling. You might have to make some difficult decisions, and feelings might be hurt. On the other hand, you might learn some things about your friends, such as how well they deal with disappointment.

  1. Where does gender play into all of this? Am I able to have one male best friend and one female best friend?(And what if my friends total is under 100? Who has 100 ‘real life’ friends anymore?!)

    • To answer the second part first: If you have 100 or fewer actual friends, then you may have only one best friend. He or she may be male or female. Or some third thing.

      You may of course have a best male friend and a best female friend, but that’s not the same as having a male best friend and a female best friend (if you’re permitted only one best friend). In fact, you can have a best male friend, a best female friend, a best three-armed friend, a best friend from another planet/dimension, and so on… but that’s because you’d be selecting a frontrunner from subsets of friends. Of the entire set of friends (of any and all types), though… well, refer to the rule.

  2. while i understand your point, it’s a bit arbitrary and due to the lack of scientific case studies & general lack of evidence to support your claim regarding ”bfflness”
    yep, i said it. bfflness.

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